- 1). Figure out if you, your spouse, or both of you don't want the relationship to work and would rather get divorced. During the next therapy session, ask your spouse if she really wants the relationship to work.
- 2). Consider if the marriage therapist is a good fit for you if you both want the marriage to work. Even though your counselor may be completely qualified to perform marriage counseling, he may not be the right counselor for you. Some people work better with certain people. Also, marriage therapists use and specialize in different types of therapy. For example, one therapist may give homework assignments every week; another may not assign anything outside of the weekly sessions.
- 3). Look for signs that the counseling is working. Are you communicating better as a couple? Have you been fighting less? Are you happier in your relationship? Do you trust your partner and feel respected by him?
- 4). Look for signs that the marriage counseling isn't working. Does you partner still ignore your romantic advances? Does he always complain about wasting time on therapy? Does he avoid your counseling homework assignments if you have any? Notice if your partner follows some of the advice that the counselor gave you, such as stepping away from an argument instead of automatically yelling.
- 5). Talk to your counselor about your concerns. If you feel that the marriage therapy may not be working, address it in your next session. Your counselor might be thinking the same thing or have ideas on how to make it more effective. Your therapist wants the marriage counseling to help you. She is going to want to know if it's not.
previous post
next post