A marriage that is struggling is in danger of divorce.
To stop divorce doesn't it make sense to learn what makes up a healthy marriage? Understanding what a healthy marriage is composed of gives you the chance to focus on making your marriage stronger than it has ever been before.
A study from 1996 looked at the characteristics of enduring and happy marriages.
These marriages didn't avoid problems but had to deal with a series of "challenges.
" Some of these challenges might look familiar in your own relationship.
The first task is establishing a marriage on its own and separate from your parents or your spouse's parents.
Sometimes this is tougher than it sounds if you have had a strong bond with your parents.
Secondly, a happy marriage is one that has a strong common viewpoint, a sense of "we-ness.
" It wasn't that these couples had no outside interests but they were willing to sacrifice and compromise for the relationship and had a strong sense of fairness.
Third, a crisis can either have a negative or positive impact on a marriage.
The negative impact would be withdrawal, resentment and depression.
A positive impact comes from mutual support and the strengthening of the relationship.
Fourth, couples need to be able to fight and to know that it does not mean the marriage is over.
Disagreements aren't a threat to the very existence of the relationship.
When fighting the partners need to be honest and at the same time considerate.
Fifth, there needs to be emotional and sexual intimacy in a marriage.
Couples in happy marriages don't always have a fulfilling sex life, as it can be negatively affected by stress and conflict.
Over time couples whose marriages last develop greater and greater emotional intimacy which complements and deepens sexual intimacy.
Sixth, a lasting marriage includes humor to help defuse hot situations, and playfulness to keep things in perspective.
Finally, a happy marriage is a place that provides safety and emotional support for both of you.
You should never come home to your partner and feel as though it's the last place you want to be.
While having a family, career, financial concerns, and other obligations can stress the marriage, couples in a happy marriage take time to recharge together and on their own.