Planning

• First, party hosts need to be decided upon. The host of the event should be the maid of honor or the entire bridal party, but other close friends can help with planning and organizing. You will need to select a date and time that fit in with the bride's already busy schedule. Aim for a date in the few weeks before the wedding, but avoid the night before the wedding. The bride and wedding party need to be well rested and refreshed for the big day and shouldn't need to worry about hangovers and exhaustion from the night before. Consult the bride on the guest list, and get in touch with all of the guests well ahead of time. Etiquette dictates that the bridesmaids must be on the guest list and that anyone else who is invited to the bachelorette party must also be invited to the wedding. Etiquette uses some common sense, too. For example, if you are planning a wild night out on the town, do not invite older relatives such as the bride's mother or future mother-in-law.
  
  Regarding money etiquette, in most cases the cost is split between either the bridesmaids or all of the party guests, with the exception of the bride-to-be. One of the hosts should be responsible for informing guests of the costs well ahead of time, making the arrangements clear to everyone and collecting the funds.
  
  

Theme

• While the stereotypical bachelorette party usually involves a night of drinking and partying, the events of the bachelorette party should be dictated by the tastes of the bride. If she prefers quiet and relaxing evenings with her closest friends, don't plan a wild party. The rules of etiquette demand that this event focus on what the bride wants. She has been dealing with the stress of planning a wedding, and the bachelorette party should aim to provide her a welcome relief from other pre-wedding activities. Consult the bride as to her tastes and preferences for the event, but don't let her do any of the actual planning, as she already has more than enough on her plate.
  
  

Ideas

• For a calming, down-to-earth experience, plan a spa visit followed by a hotel suite stocked with wine and "chick flicks." If the bride prefers a girls' night out without the drinking and partying, make reservations at a nice restaurant for dinner, then chip in for a few gift cards and take the bride on a shopping spree for items for her honeymoon. The co-ed bachelor/bachelorette party is another idea with increasing popularity. If the bride and groom are both interested in an event without serious girl-only or guy-only bonding time, then you can consider taking the whole group out to dinner and a few bars or a show. If the bride does want the typical wild night of letting loose with the girls, this is always an option too. Select a few nice bars and hire a limo driver to provide safe and sober transportation to each location as well as a ride back home or to a nearby hotel for the guests.