The song is from the mid 1930's but the lyrics are timeless: "The winds of March that make my heart a dancer - A telephone that rings, but whose to answer? - Oh, how the ghost of you clings - These foolish things remind me of you." Apparently the writers of this tune were also trying to get their ex back.
When you meet that special someone and then lose them for whatever reason it can be a haunting experience and you find yourself willing to do almost anything to get them back in you life.
It's a beautiful romantic notion but in the real world you want to be careful how far you take it. Getting your ex back does not mean you throw out all rhyme and reason or your self dignity. Pride is one thing, integrity is something else entirely.
Therefore as you go about getting your ex back be very careful to avoid some pitfalls.
1. Guilty Verdict
The break up has caused you to get down on yourself. You accept all the blame whether it was truly your fault or not. In your moments of solitude you go hunting for more blame to heap on yourself. No surprise you find new blame every time you look.
Don't go there. Whatever was done is done. You feel bad enough do yourself a favor and avoid adding to your misery. Both of you made mistakes accept that as well as your self worth and move on.
2. Building a Monument
This goes hand in hand with the guilt. The more blame you shoulder the more your ex comes off looking like some superhuman being. They are not. And if you really want them back the last thing you want to do is start putting them on a pedestal. If you do and the two of you get back together you are asking for trouble. Eventually it will come to you that they cannot possibly live up to the shrine you have built for them.
3. No Respect
When the two of you called it quits your ex indicated they still had some feeling for you. Those feelings will dissipate in a hurry if you do not respect their decision in regards to the relationship. Calling them incessantly or peppering their family and friends with questions says that just that. If you don't respect their decision now, than it's a good indicator you will act the same way if by chance the two of you get back together.
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