A man's sense of self is delineated by his power to accomplish results. They don't study magazines like Psychology Today, Self, or People. They're more interested in outdoor activities, like hunting, sport fishing, and racing cars. They're intrigued with the news, weather, and sports and couldn't care less about love novels and self-help books. They're more concerned in "objects" and "things" instead of individuals and feelings.

Men are obsessed with the "things" that may help them express mightiness by producing results and accomplishing their goals. Accomplishing goals is really important, as it is a way for him to prove
his competence and therefore feel great about himself. And for him to feel great about himself he must accomplish these goals by himself. Somebody else can't accomplish them for him. Understanding this characteristic may help women comprehend why men resist so much
being corrected or being told what to accomplish. To provide a man unsought advice is to assume that he doesn't know what to do or that he can't accomplish it on his own. This is among the reasons men instinctively provide solutions when women discuss issues. When a woman innocently shares distressed feelings or explores aloud the issues of her day, a man erroneously presumes she's seeking some expert advice. He starts presenting advice; this is his way of showing love and of attempting to help.

When he's offered a resolution, however, and she remains upset, it gets increasingly hard for him to listen as his resolution is being rejected and he feels increasingly worthless. He has no clue that by simply listening empathetically he may be supportive. He doesn't know that discussing issues isn't an invitation to provide a solution. Women have different values. They treasure love, communication, beauty, and relationships. They spend much time supporting, helping, and nurturing each other. Their sense of self is delineated through their feelings and the caliber of their relationships. They get fulfillment by sharing and relating. Instead of constructing highways and tall buildings, they're more concerned with cohabitation in harmony, community, and loving cooperation. Relationships are more crucial than work and technology. Personal expression, particularly of their feelings, is really crucial.

Communication is of chief importance. To share their personal feelings is much more crucial than accomplishing goals and success. Talking and relating to each other is a source of enormous fulfillment. This is difficult for a man to understand. Women are really involved in personal development, spirituality, and everything that may nurture life, healing, and growth. They pride themselves in being considerate of the needs and feelings of other people. A sign of great love is to provide help and assistance to some other without being asked. As proving one's competence isn't as crucial, offering help isn't offensive, and needing help isn't a sign of weakness. A man, though,
might feel offended as when a woman provides advice he doesn't feel she trusts his power to do it himself.

A woman has no conception of this male predisposition as for her it's another feather in her hat if somebody offers to help her. It makes her feel loved and treasured. However offering help to a man may make him feel incompetent, weak, and even unloved.

Women firmly feel that when something is working it may always work better. Their nature is to wish to better things. When they care about somebody, they freely point out what may be improved and
suggest how to accomplish it.

Offering advice and constructive critique is an act of love. When a woman attempts to better a man, he feels she's trying to fix him. He gets the message that he's broken. She doesn't recognize her
caring attempts to help him might humiliate him. She erroneously thinks she's simply helping him to grow.

To summarize the 2 most common errors we make in relationships:

1. A man attempts to change a woman's feelings if she's upset by offering resolutions to her issues that void her feelings.

2. A woman attempts to alter a man's behavior when he makes errors by offering unsought advice or critique.

If you're a woman, I propose that for the next week rehearse restraining from presenting any unsought advice or critique. The men in your life not only will appreciate it but likewise will be more
attentive and responsive to you.

If you're a man, I advise that for the next week you rehearse listening whenever a woman talks, with the exclusive intention of respectfully understanding what she's going through. Rehearse biting your tongue if you get the urge to provide a solution or change how she's feeling. You'll be surprised once you experience how much she appreciates you.