Feeling confident means many things to different people.
Some people may feel that they lack confidence when engaged in personal interaction at a party or social event.
For others it is having the self belief to ask the boss for a raise.
In other cases it might just be the ability to go outside their own front door, or take a walk to the shops.
Whatever the background to these concepts, the unifying theme is that a person is suffering because their own mind is holding them back.
If we look to the dictionary for a definition of confidence we find words and phrases such as: firm belief or conviction, faith, self reliance, firmness, boldness and presumption.
From this we can see that the foundations of confidence come from within.
Understanding that the source of confidence is internal and not external is a key point.
Facing the Fears Persons lacking in confidence are often not in fear of an actual event.
They are apprehensive of a possible future that they wish to avoid.
These fears are internally generated.
Understanding that this imaginary negative future may not become reality is central to any attempt to change for the better.
A person held at knifepoint during a mugging has real reason to feel nervous and seek to avoid the situation, yet a person lacking in self confidence may have similar feelings merely at the thought of speaking to another person.
Attempting to overcome these irrational fears, or at least scale them down to a more realistic proportion is central in developing strong self confidence.
How to Develop Self Confidence When it is Lacking From the earlier definition we can see that there needs to be a belief in self.
A simple way to build this necessary self belief is to experience success.
If small goals are set and accomplished then larger goals become more attainable.
Realistic goal setting allowing for success and positive reinforcement when it is achieved are central.
It must also be realized that occasional setbacks and failures are part of the process.
Once the basic fear of taking action is overcome a person lacking self confidence will grow from their experience of life providing there is trust and encouragement in a loving setting.
Faking Self Confidence It is interesting to note that if a person can be taught how to fake confidence, even though they feel terrified, that in time natural self reliance follows in its wake.
So yes, it is definitely possible to fake being confident.
From this we can see that being confident involves taking physical action which allows for growth and development, rather than giving in to mental paralysis.
As the saying goes, "Feel the fear and do it anyway.
" You will be glad you did.