One thing about being a psychologist is that people often are eager to share their personal experiences with you, not only in the formal setting of an office, but in informal settings as well.
I can recall being seated next to a bright, successful woman in her 50s on a flight to Philadelphia who, after introductions, casually talked about all the painful moments in her life.
I can only assume that she did this for the cathartic relief she believed it would bring, or perhaps she was seeking some sage advice.
At the top of her list was the failure of her first marriage.
Then came a high-school romance that ended with her "being dumped," which led to plummeting self-confidence about ever finding a mate.
Surprisingly, also on this woman's list was her second-grade teacher's recommendation that she be retained.
As she explained in staccato-like fashion, and with an increasingly reddened face, "It would have been the worst decision ever.
I would have been so embarrassed.
I would have been psychologically crushed.
It would have been devastating.
I told my mother I would never go to school again.
Thank goodness my parents finally spoke up.
" Imagine, after more than forty years, this woman still remembered that experience and, interestingly, she described it using trauma-like terms.
And the reason her teacher wanted to retain her? Because she was shy.
Today we hear a more nebulous term - immaturity - that many schools use to justify holding a child back in school.
As this story illustrates, retaining a child in grade - or even the threat of it - could have consequences that are forever etched into memory.
The retention practices that we see today are perpetuated more by tradition and personal beliefs than by solid research.
For example, it's still common to hear, "If you're going to hold a student back, it's better to do it in the early grades," when research to support such a claim is scant at best.
Retaining a child stings at any age, and the benefits are questionable at any age.
The decision to retain a child - if it's to be done at all - must not be rushed.
Past and present test scores, past and present classroom performance, classroom observations, teacher recommendations, the child's developmental and medical history, and the parents' feelings all should be considered when making such an important, potentially life-altering decision.
It may be tempting to forego the time-consuming task of collecting all this information and to simply use standardized test scores as the sole basis for retaining a student, but a high-stakes decision such as this should not be based on test scores alone.
Doing so assumes that test scores are perfect, which they aren't.
The potential psychological, social-behavioral, and academic consequences that may not be seen until years later also should be taken into account.
For example, a growing body of evidence suggests that the effects of retaining a child in grade go deeper and are more far-reaching than simply lowering the child's self-esteem.
Potential problems include an increased risk of behavior problems, poor long-term gains in achievement, an increased risk of dropping out of school, and difficulty with social relationships.
In closing, if the preponderance of evidence indicates that a child shouldn't be retained in grade except under extenuating circumstances, what then is the alternative? The alternative is to provide quality instruction.
The instruction, which may be provided individually or in small groups, should be research-based (that is, have a proven track record of being effective) and geared toward building the child's strengths and remediating weaknesses rather exposing him or her to the same instruction and the same frustrations for another year.
Copyright Joseph D.
Rocchio 2011